Saturday, October 15, 2016

Beach Sloth - It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside it’s what’s on the internet that counts 11.0

                Among the masterpieces of the world Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection is the best. Other forms of art are stupid compared to what Beach Sloth has effortlessly accomplished in his debut poetry publication. Writers yearn to truly navigate the depths of the human soul the way an anonymous dad sloth does with absolute ease. Throughout the collection Beach Sloth goes from hilarious to tragic in mere fractions of an inch. Of course this may be due to the font size but it is a grand testament to Beach Sloth’s powers as a highly blogging entity that his work appears to be perfected within these hallowed pages. 

                Trees give their lives for books but usually those books are not as good as Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection. Few things can be. Beach Sloth has for years, nigh decades, supported people. His credo of “Support Each Other” can be felt throughout the surprising debut poetry collection. At times dark and touching Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection takes a different approach from his actual blogging material. Yes the playfulness is still there. Yet there is specific commentary on some of the people that Beach Sloth truly cares for both people he has encountered and people he grew up with. For limiting the collection to random strangers, while fitting his blog’s aesthetic, is thrown aside for a more personal approach. 

                What is most interesting about Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection is the dearth of sloths. Throughout the collection Beach Sloth fails to mention much in the way of actual sloths. Maybe this is because Beach Sloth feels it is too painful to reflect upon growing up in a human’s world as a mere sloth covered in algae hanging off of trees. Currently few are interested in the secret lives of sloths excluding the valiant efforts of a select few biochemists who realize that sloth algae could provide a plethora of life-extending and life-improving pharmaceuticals. 

                Until such time as scientists are able to cure common ailments using sloth back algae, there is Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection. Sure maybe Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection will be unable to cure the common cold but it can improve the spirit and isn’t that just as good, if not better? There is a lot of harshness in life a lot of people who feel like doing it alone. Life does not need to be that way. People are social creatures and with Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection people will feel closer together. And that is better than any medicine. 

                Go HERE to learn more about the importance of Beach Sloth’s debut poetry collection,how to order, and how to have a fun time in general. 

Note for Book Price: While I have a 'pay what you want' feature I would say that the minimum suggested price for the book is $13 US/Canada, $18 International (I figure I am going to be sending a lot of stuff internationally).

Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Beach Sloth is creating Blogs

                Beach Sloth is a project I created officially on July 27th, 2010. I love blogging about people. There is so much culture to explore and support. Ever since I began Beach Sloth I have not needed a TV for anything. My life has been fulfilled seeing what wonderful pieces of work made it online into my browsers, my emails, my PDFs, my videos, and my music. Honestly thanks to Beach Sloth I have been exposed to more culture than I could ever possibly wrap my arms around. 

                That is why I created a Patreon account. I could use a few sponsors to help me meet my monthly expenses which are pretty small. I live frugally. At this point I do not need much to survive since I have cut down what I consider my needs. What I do know that I need, what I am passionate about, is all the wonderful people I have reviewed on this blog. Countless individuals that I have been fortunate enough to meet have become incredibly close friends, the kinds of friends that I can confide in and treat just like those people I have met in person.

                Financial support for Beach Sloth gives me a reason to spend a greater amount of time on auxiliary aspects of the project. Already I have released an e-book through Amazon, a chapbook I printed myself, an album free for download, an e-book released for free through Peanut Gallery Press (which has been favorably mentioned by Dennis Cooper), and a book through Dig That Book Co. So I try to keep Beach Sloth as active as I possibly can. 

                Everything I create for the blog shall continue to be free. I have great plans for Beach Sloth, including an eventual full-length book, another full-length album offered free of charge, and smaller e-books and chapbooks. People who feel like contributing money to me via Patreon can do so right

                I also understand a lot of my readership cannot afford to support me via Patreon. My presence on Patreon will not change anything about what I can for the blog. All it means is if someone wants to support me financially outside of the usual avenues of:

And – my Paypal account, which has since become an MEME 

             Recently I have also decided to start a Fiverr account which basically expands what I do on a regular basis into new forms. If you are interested in my Fiverr work (want something written, shared, re-tweeted, etc.) you can go:


They can. It is that simple. Nothing else will change. I shall continue Beach Sloth, this passion project of mine, because I think that what I do is rewarding in ways outside of mere monetary concerns. My ultimate goal for Beach Sloth is to have it financially support me and a small group of writers I particularly like (I have people in mind for this). That is far away but with Patreon that can become considerably easier. Thank you for reading this and thank you for coming to my little corner of the universe. 

                Additionally I would like to thank everyone who has been able to support me on Patreon. It means more to me than I can possibly express.

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Advertising on Beach Sloth

                Today on this old Blog I have a special announcement: I am offering advertising up to whoever is interested. By no means is this going to dramatically change much of anything. After a few years of pouring my heart and scroll into this fine invention I’m ready to take things to the next level. 

                Advertising is in a few forms. Anybody interested in advertising can feel free to contact me at the following address:


                I use that address exclusively for anything payment or Beach Sloth business related. That address proved to be infinitely helpful whenever I have sold T-shirts or chapbooks. Anybody can buy either of those things from me still. 

                T-shirts, Buttons, Etc. go here.
                Chapbooks go here.
                Patreon (NEW) go here.

                I offer a few things for advertising purposes. As the blog is now an increasingly smaller part of what I do I also offer other places to advertise:

                My Twitter
                My Tumblr

                My advertising efforts have already begun prior to this post. Nobody has noticed yet so I figured now would be a great time to take things to the next level. Whoever is interested in advertising through any of my online platforms can do so. Simply email me, let me know what you need, what sort of prices you would be willing to pay, and what kind of advertising you are hoping to do (music, literature, other products, etc.). 

                Thus far my advertising efforts have been pretty successful since they have reinforced rather than taken away from what I have already done. Beach Sloth is a huge passion project for me. I hope to continue doing exactly what I love doing on all platforms. This project has taken on a life of its own. My initial estimate for the length of Beach Sloth was a year, tops, maybe two years. Now it is close to entering its fourth year, hence my desire to try and make this more sustainable for me. 

                Note that I am going to continue this Blog for the indefinite future. There is no specific end in sight for this site. I want to continue doing this with the least amount of interruption possible. I am infinitely thankful for everything everyone has managed to do for me. I have received great support for this project which is why it has continued this long. 

                Whoever is interested in simply donating me money (through the kindness of their heart) can do so via my PayPal account: I will continue to blog for you. That is a promise.

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Ben Eyes - FL00D

Deeply affecting, Ben Eyes tells an entire story with “FL00D”. From such pastoral origins the piece manages to cover quite a swath of territory. Crystal clear at first, idyllic in tone, Ben Eyes ever so carefully disrupts this scene. Akin to the weather and climate change the piece reflects upon, the tension builds up with such ease that it is difficult to point to an exact moment when it all changed. 

Introducing the piece is gentle guitar work. The rhythm remains quite subdued as a field recording comes into view. Eventually Ben Eyes lets this guitar simply drop out of the mix letting the song focus on the pure zen, the light crashing waves on the shore. Upon the return of the guitar the piece takes on a melancholy affect. Out of this elegant work comes anxiety-inducing shoegaze textures that have an otherworldly feeling to them. Ringing up into the heavens this is the sound of cloudy days spent dreaming. Going closer towards the world are the sounds of an urbane life. Various sources of noise compete for attention as Ben Eyes skillfully weaves his elongated guitar work into the mix. The passage of time lets the climax of the song occur without any further external influence as the song enters into a dramatic sweeping wave. 

Thoughtful and gripping, Ben Eyes describes the effects of climate change without needing to say a word. 

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

OUR LIFE IS SO WEIRD IM SORRY (2015) by Steve Roggenbuck

After a long wait the new Steve Roggenbuck video has dropped. The tiger introduces it, a tiger that serves as Steve Roggenbuck’s watermark of approval. Water features prominently in the video as it is a Tucson rainstorm that introduces and ends the video. 

Fulfillment costs nothing. The weird thing is there are plenty of companies that try to sell it to people and people buy it quite willingly. Life does not have to be as empty as it has been advertised. Plenty of people live perfectly happy lives without that thing that’s been plastered on the Internet, on billboards, and in extreme cases, on eyelids. Everybody living in the future (which is when they read this in the future) ought to know that they are loved, that the world is full of love and the love is earned though not in the way that takes hours from a person called ‘work’. 

Out in the heavens is Postcrunk. The thing about Postcrunk is he loves life. He tells people about all the ways they can appreciate the here and the now, differently than what it has been in the past. Universes are given shout outs by Postcrunk probably because he wants to connect with his other universe entities which in hindsight are pretty cool beings. 

Right in the corner of the screen is a confirmed Reptilian. Reptilians are always busy trying to get into YouTube videos. For too long the online MEME game has been going to the cats and dogs. Poor Reptilians may never gain the online currency they need to get free gift cards to enlightenment, aka Subway: “Eat Whatever. It doesn’t matter”. 

Hugs takes about 80 years to give, the good ones anyway. Bad hugs take less time because bad hugs ought to be taken out with the trash because bad hugs are trash. That is the way they have been represented perhaps somewhat inaccurately. Sadly the bad hugs of the world reign supreme running for political office, eating smelly bananas, and generally making the world a worse place. 

Emotional deadness can be quite the opposite of chill, unchill if you will (and believe me, you will). Suits, uniforms, these restrict the body and these restrict the person. Dressed up in this assigned flattery the individuals flatter themselves thinking that what they are doing is more than themselves giving them carte blanche over the rest of the universe in a bad way sometimes (though not all times). 

Once more the video returns to the quiet Tucson suburb, full of rain and full of life. When the skies cries people ought to get outside and scream to the heavens to cheer the sky up. The sky is all about making things cool again. 

Monday, November 23, 2015

I’m Anti-Social: Coffee Never Lies by Mallory Smart

Humanity slips through the cracks and codes it created. This is what it means to be a human in the cloud. Slowly but surely people descend deep into themselves. There is no better place for introspection than the Internet. For the Internet offers no judgement it lets people roam completely free in fields of the infinite. However the thing about humanity is at some point the judgement gets imported as cultural norms in reality translate over into the Internet. Good thing most of the idiots who live in reality have yet to discover every nook and cranny online thus there are some spaces that remain completely below the radar. 

Life requires people to be awake but only part of the time. Coffee is a way that people try to stay awake for things that really are sleep-inducing. Plenty of work is purposeless yet the goal is to try and find that perfect job. Thus there is the power suit ready to try and burst forth with importance. Harnessing the power suit requires great technical skill and a desire to simply subdue one’s non-work related goals. A life given over to purposeless work can be awfully well-paid and generally awful. Many hours of sleep are lost to work, worrying about work, with not nearly enough hours spent on relaxing. 

Work exists as a way of trying to quantify greatness. People express pride in their jobs. They use it as a way of lording over others judging others wondering what other people do with their free time. A life without free time is a life less lived. Intelligence too serves people in similar ways. Great knowledge comes with great responsibility. While someone may know the plot of a book it does not mean that they understand it at all. Rather the goal of acquiring knowledge is to simply hold onto it and never let it go. Others share their knowledge kindly. For the insecure knowledge may be one of the few things they have and the insecurity ends up creating distinctly unbalanced power dynamics with other people. 

Being social is overrated. People need time to focus on themselves. This is often called lonely or selfish but that’s very reductive. Space is a must for there are literally millions of empty places that should stay empty as individuals contemplate their place in the world, what their life entails, and what they should/could be doing differently. Sometimes silence is the best way to spend time, the lovely contemplation of solitude is a must. 

Bruce Cohen - Three BC

Recalling the halcyon days of early Warp Records, Bruce Cohen’s “Three BC” is an incredible journey. Possessing a keen ear for melody the textures shimmer and shine. At times nearly psychedelic with his deeply physical yet emotionally affecting songs, these are sounds to get completely lost in for the multiple layers and speed is astounding. 

“Blue Stomp” the album opener, wastes absolutely no time in getting started. With a clever ebb and flow of sound the song is structured ideally revealing a keen sense of pacing. Much more subdued in tone is the neon-hued synthesizer sweeps of “Shoot First” which at times is reminiscent of early Future Sound of London. The bright melody of “Dead On” makes it a true highlight bouncy around iridescently. Swirling around with a slight hint of shoegaze’s love of textures is the grandeur of “Witches Brew”. A haunting melody helps to add to the depth of “Witches Brew” making it feel nostalgic at times. By far the highlight and the heart of the album is the grandeur of “Just Be Boom”. Here the sweeping melody and unstoppable rhythm give it a dreamy quality. Riffing off of this theme works wonders and shows off Bruce Cohen’s impeccable taste. An absolute beast of a track is the sheer physicality of “This Is The One”. “Opus Funkus” ends the album on a high note. Funk in tone “Opus Funkus” has an almost geometric quality to it, constantly shifting and transforming into something new while adhering to the infectious beat. 

On “Three BC” Bruce Cohen shows off an uncanny ability to merge elements of EDM and ambient resulting in a satisfying whole.

Download a FREE mp3 of BLUE STOMP on SoundCloud ►

Chickenpox Party - Chickenpox Party

On Chickenpox Party’s self-titled debut they made raw blues rock for the masses. With their album they build upon rock’s origins offering up dense complex pieces of music. By tying the pieces together with a sense of play such as the album’s childlike intro “Scabby the Clown” and the kazoos that mark the end of “So Long” the album is a coherent fully realized whole. Everything works from the tremendous guitar riffing of Gregory Smith to the hard-hitting nimble drumming of Bodie Davis to the physicality of Joey Jones’s bass. 

After the intro skit of “Scabby the Clown” they get into the thick of things with the intense “Dumbentia”. Showing off his impressive chops Gregory Smith’s guitar playing is phenomenal. Flowing off of this is the catchy “In the Woods” where their vocals feel perfectly suited, with the right mix of southern and classic rock. Taking a slight breather the dusty organ work of “Fair Weathered Friend” creates an eerie mood. Possessing great range is the intricate structure of “Ill Deliberation” where they turn the volume down opting for tension. By far the highlight of the album is the jazzy work of “Mamacita” where they go for a lighter, looser, at times even funky, sort of style. Full of energy is the out of control work of “Just the Same” where the entire band comes out swinging from the maniacal drumming to the taut guitar lines. Sprawling in scope and quite ambitious is the reflective “It’s A Man’s Man’s Man’s World”. Bringing the album to a close is the reassuring tones of “So Long”. 

Together Chickenpox Party creates an enormous lumbering beast of rock.

Lee Williams - Fly Away

Nobody plays the guitar like Lee Williams. Immediately sounding like a classic “Fly Away” shows off Lee Williams and his impressive undeniable chops. Thankfully he has a band that is more than able to match his level of mastery. From the physical felt as much as heard drums to the subtle yet precise bass, everything comes together to create an absolute chaotic blast of a song. 

Impressive guitars announce the beginning of the song. After a few moments of the song’s structure coming together the song takes off. The forceful driving rhythm stays strong for the duration of the song remaining of the utmost importance. Staying true to this rhythm everything else stems and plays off of it careening into the cosmos. By far the highlight of the song is the impossible commanding acrobatics of Lee Williams guitar soloing. What Lee Williams can do with the guitar ought to put most to shame. Lee Williams makes the guitar positively sing. Freewheeling dynamics help to serve the song giving it a wild unhinged feeling to it. Vocals as well hover above it all giving off the sense of a long lost classic rock song. Towards the end the band completely lets loose letting it all out. Even at its most intense the song adheres to a careful sense of melodic progression, making it truly catchy and an absolute delight. 

On “Fly Away” Lee Williams taps into the true heart and soul of rock n’ roll. 

Sunday, November 22, 2015

My Body Would be the Kindest of Strangers by Fiona Helmsley

Fiona Helmsley’s “My Body Would be the Kindest of Strangers” is about living a life in opposition to standard expectations. This means that punk rock comes up frequently as rumination of selling out, taste, aesthetics, and ultimate artistic purpose all are woven into the DNA of the book. Bringing these ideas together is the less traveled path, a difficult teenage hood, time spent doing the different things. 

Personnel experiences serve as the vast majority of the body of work. The trips spent going to seedy parts of Connecticut, how that turned out, the many players involved in that journey. Some of the tough love receives notable attention: from not being allowed to come back home to the story of Amber, a person with whom Fiona Helmsley could sympathize in some manner. Amongst these better individuals are plenty of mere ghosts: sometimes they consist of individuals she met in New York City who brought her to the Bowery, back when the Bowery was a very different, less squeaky clean kind of place. 
A few are literal ghosts as she sort of focuses on a unique kind of artist, the “pet savage”. Her critiques of the pet savage are particularly compelling. While she states that her aesthetic interests often bring her to these “ugly” artists (G.G. Allin) it is also rather disturbing the amount of leeway said artists are given in pursuit of their craft. One of these individuals is underground writer Gene Gregorits. Titled “Thoughts on the Shit Show” the chapter dives into exactly what drives the sort of transgressive artistic output or “pet savages” as she refers to them. Aspects of this work serves a greater purpose, one which explores the disaffection that effects plenty.

Plenty of these “pet savages” artists have no rules and in essence run a “shit show” where nothing is sacred. While most do adhere to a certain set of standard expectations in terms of behavior, these “pet savages” get relaxed standards because to expect the normal would be an affront to what they do. In this section Fiona Helmsley explains why so much of her writing comes from her time when she was a drug addict because it is a more revealing look at showing who she was. However, even with this in mind, there are still limits. Gene Gregorits is commended as being a very good writer however by dedication to the shit show, the “pet savage” he eventually goes too far, using his art as an excuse for inexcusable behavior. 

Throughout the book Fiona Helmsley displays a unique gift for storytelling. Elements of her stories ring particularly true from the realization that disaffection sold to teenagers under the guise that this is what the rebel actually said. A quote of Sid Vicious appears throughout the book with the book only later lamenting that this was a marketing ploy to meet that specific emotional need at that specific point in time. A few moments in particular show how packaging of a unique experience can have a deleterious effect on the message: like how Fiona Helmsley eventually comes to realize what Courtney Love had to say with her band “Hole” when at the time she was too much of a “punk rock purist” to ever accept “Hole” or “Nirvana” into her listening habits. By far the most affecting of these moments is her time near the middle of nowhere, kicked out of rehab and cold in the snow. Here she is at her absolute loneliest away from everything with only an elderly man and his wife saving her from complete disconnection. These small moments, the tiny ones, are the ones that Fiona Helmsley explores with grace and style. 

“My Body Would be the Kindest of Strangers” possesses a unique empathy for those at the fringes from addicts to artists. Fiona Helmsley genuinely cares about the individuals she writes about whether they were people she knew directly and hoped they would find their own shining path, to those who she saw from afar and those who offered her hope, showed her a new way.